Previous Life

I just graduated from college. My days of being a registered student are over. My big boohoo off late.

Being an adult is really boring, with all the responsibility talk and getting older blah. I never wanted to grow up, turning 17 was painful, 18 was depressing and now maybe I have come to terms with the fact that I have to grow old, along with everyone else and turn 23 after 6 months.
Fear of aging is something like death and taxes you are sure you are going to feel it one day.

I also had to let go of loads of friends over the weekend and over many years. Its like I just went through an Autumn of Friendship, where I am losing most of the friends that have grown on me over the past years. I think winter's setting in. I wonder when spring will arrive.

I don't know whether its parody or irony that seasons and time make and break, bring together and pull apart,heal and wound. To love and hate them again is subjective to what you have experienced with these twins of life.I don't know whether my winter will be harsh, my spring be bountiful. Isn't that why we never sometimes want to let go of our good past, because we don't know whether the memories of the past will sustain us through out a future winter of an unknown duration.

Sometimes memories, reality and dreams get mixed up and I dont know whether the life I lived was a dream or a distant memory. Its hard to imagine that this time some time back I was leading a very different life.


My previous life as a student was perfect. My present life as a cub in the jungle who is trying to find her feet. I hope my after (right now) life will be................